Varanasi, India
January 12, 2010
Baptism By Ganesha
Stepping onto a city street in India is like being punched in the face. Hit in the nose with the smell of curry and cumin, the eyes with reds and purples on the women's saris and the ears with the honking of a hundred rickshaw horns. You better have your senses ready for a good fight cause India is quick and clever and taken down many a traveler before you.
I start my journey just like all travelers to India do: a mango lassi followed by two days of chronic diarrhea. Welcome to India, lady, namaste. I make my way south to Kerala to a meditation and yoga ashram on a quest for enlightenment. Or at least a glimpse of it. My days begin at 5:30am and are filled with chanting, silent meditation, yoga asanas, breathing exercises, classes, and two vegetarian meals per day. The best part: you yoga clothes, essentially pajamas, all day long. The retreat hosts about 75 others from all over the globe. One night I find myself sharing tea with an Iranian, Columbian, Israeli and Briton - and that's not the start of a bad joke.
Since the center takes care of everything for you, you have no time to distract yourself with work or errands - you start to see people's real feelings come to the surface. Their fears, insecurities, frustrations, joys and tears. It can be ugly, it can be lovely, but mainly it's just open. Open to whatever comes up. But this is why you came, right, to go deeper.
The Hindu god that I feel the most drawn to is Ganesha, the elephant god, the Destroyer of Obstacles. He’s the "gateway god", the Hindu god that you try once and get hooked to try others. If you're gonna go on a journey into the crunchy parts of yourself, you're gonna want Ganesha by your side - wielding his mighty trunk through your ego's B.S.
January 10, 2010
January 3, 2010
Quote: Amma's Love
Hug from a saint? Check. I just visited Amma's ashram and received her famous hug. She really does have "it", that sparkle in her eye, that feeling of coming home.
- Amma (Mata Amritanandamayi Devi)
December 27, 2009
December 23, 2009
December 20, 2009
Don't Forget To Breathe
I've now taken up residence at the Sivananda Yoga and Meditation Ashram in south India. It's essentially Hippie Bootcamp. We wake up to a bell at 5:30AM for our daily satsang of meditation and chanting.
I'm starting to get used to this Pavlov dog routine: bell - wake, bell - chant, bell - eat, bell - yoga, bell - meditate. The silent meditation is a challenge but I feel like I'm getting more adept each day. At least for five seconds at a time. Om it, sistah, om shanti.
December 18, 2009
December 15, 2009
Quote: There is a Thread ...
I commenced my two+ weeks at the yoga ashram. I keep thinking of this quote:
"There is a thread from the heart to the lips where the secret of life is woven. Words tear the thread but in the silence the secrets speak."
- RUMI
December 12, 2009
December 11, 2009
December 10, 2009
Asante Sana (Goodbye Africa!)
One last sunset across the Serengeti and then I will leave this magnificent land. Thank you, Africa, for lifting up your skirt to the knee - just enough to reveal a small glimpse of your immense beauty. I had no idea stars could look like that. Thank you for the sincerest smiles I've ever seen. For showing me how utterly raw this planet still is. For teaching me how to dodge hippos, wash my clothes in rain water and make fresh coconut milk. But most of all, thank you for letting me share some love and kindness with your beautiful children.
Asante sana.
December 5, 2009
December 4, 2009
Baptism By Heartstrings
No need for an alarm clock, I wake up to the mosque’s call to prayer “Allah, Hayalahhh” followed by dogs howling, followed by a rooster crowing. It’s 5:00AM - Welcome to Arusha, Tanzania.
Arusha is gritty and defiant and she doesn’t give a damn if you catch her picking her nose. That’s right, sister. The town pulses with a sort of primal sass. And no matter how much you try to act like a local, you cannot and will not fit in, regardless of color. I hear 'Jambo Muzungu' alot, which basically means 'Hey Whitey'. I sense annoyance of my presence at times. I get marriage proposals. The kids like to touch my hair.
I live in a house with two other volunteers. There are cement walls around the compound, two guards, a cook and a driver. In many ways it's fantastic but it feels strange to live this way, there are people living in tiny one-room homes just meters away. I carry a large packet of guilt in my pocket.
My volunteer placement is at a preschool with kids. Some are HIV positive, some not but all are angels/demons. One second they are running to you, arms outstretched, in search of a hug. And the next they are biting each other. The school is a room in a tiny home made of concrete. I teach in my bare feet. It's humbling. My favorite time is when they take their porridge break, the cups look so big in their little hands.
A few afternoons a week I volunteer at Cradle of Love, an orphanage for babies. For two hours you can play and care for up to 35 orphaned babies. And have your heart broken and filled, broken and filled over and over again. The warmth that these tiny souls give - it burns a happy little hole into your heart.
So, yes, a part of me thought that I'd make a difference. And maybe I did for an afternoon for one child for one moment. But I did learn that we should give a little something back - in someway, anyway. Volunteer for a day, donate to a cause, sponsor a kid, smile at a stranger. Pull at someone else's heartstrings and yours will be pulled back.
November 26, 2009
Quote: Often I Feel ...
Often I feel I go to some distant region of the world to be reminded of who I really am. There is no mystery about why this should be so. Stripped of your ordinary surroundings, your friends, your daily routines, your refrigerator full of your food, your closet full of your clothes -- with all this taken away, you are forced into direct experience. Such direct experience inevitably makes you aware of who it is that is having the experience. That's not always comfortable, but it is always invigorating.
- MICHAEL CRICHTON, TRAVELS
November 25, 2009
November 24, 2009
African Queen
Now THIS is Africa. I’m off the overland tour and volunteering with children at a preschool in Arusha. The woman, Anna, that operates the school is HIV positive, has six children of her own and two adopted kids. Her husband and sister died of AIDS. She is strong and spirited - a real African queen.
The school is essentially a tiny concrete room in her home. It's warm and cold at the same time - we teach in our bare feet. I am out of my element as "Teacher Nico", it's a whole new world to be in front of 12 sets of big brown eyes reciting the alphabet. It's challenging and exhausting and invigorating all at the same time. I have a whole new respect for real teachers.
I'm eager to see how this time unfolds and hope I can give even just a little bit back.
November 21, 2009
November 20, 2009
Heart of Darkness
I've only lived in Tanzania for two weeks but here are some imprints of the beautiful people and norms here.
Jambo Muzungu! - This is what I hear 30 times per day. It basically means Hey Whitey! and is often times accompanied with a giggle.
Dala Dala - The local transportation system. Essentially a large van, room for 12 yet accommodates 22. But feels like 42. I've twice had live chickens under my feet. Stepping out of it is like being birthed from the womb.
Pig Noise - Many people, especially women, made a grunting slash pig sound to clear their throats. It's a bit startling but mostly funny.
Chipati - Similar to a savory pancake. There is something so satisfyingly primal about eating with your hands.
Dancing - Just. Amazing. Witnessing some of the moves in the local bars is like watching a professional dance show. I had no idea a booty could shake vertically like that.
PDA - You will never see a male/female couple holding hands but you will see male friends walking hand in hand or arm in arm. It's cute.
It's raw here and it's like watching life in the third person at times.
November 15, 2009
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